So you go through this life meeting people, making friends and then losing touch. Some you keep in contact with off and on and in your mind things are okay. But you begin to notice that you are the only one reaching out. You are the only one making contact. So you wait. And wait....and wait.....and then you notice your name disappearing from their internet world. It's like it was not meant to be. Do you look at it as the good times that were shared, the laughs and the confidence in each other? Or do you see the time and distance between each other and blame it on that? What if there is some unsaid problem that they would rather not face and just leave you to wonder until sometime down the road you run into each other with some awkward excuse as to why there has been silence. Is it just easier in some people's minds to just blow off friends they would rather not confront? Or does it just seem in their minds that the friendship has dwindled and there is no need to even try. Is it maybe me because I haven't seen these people in a couple years and haven't tried to reach out in a while that I am looking too deep into things? Was there no closeness in the first place? Were there false pretences? I do believe friendships can last long distances. For I have a couple that are still so strong and we are still so close. I may not be there in person for them, but I am always here. More and more I notice myself losing trust for people. If the trust hasn't been built up for years already and haven't been close to me, then I have become weary. Too many recent friends have come up foul. Lately it's been the same feeling of what did I do and why does this continue to happen. Do I pick the wrong people? Or is there really some sort of personality flaw that I don't see? Maybe it's just all typical female drama and since I don't like to play that game I just don't understand it. Maybe I'm guilty of it too though.....
posted by: Michelle  |  date & time: 12:44 PM  |  comments: (3)

So this day four years ago Joe and I were both a few pounds lighter, a few years younger, but not any less wierd. For these past years we have put up with each other's silliness. Such as Joe walking around stores singing 'I wish I were an Oscar Meyer wiener' or putting his pj's on my pillow so when I get in bed I laugh. But also the good things. He has to but ask and I will whip him up anything in the kitchen, and sometimes without asking I do. (hence me being blamed for the extra weight) The man doesn't have a chore one in the house anymore. But I have become spoiled.....hee...I have had 3 brand new cars in 5 years. (just one example...a big one)But as for the most spoiled, Tristan wins hands down. I bought Joe a new wedding ring. If you saw the one he wore at our wedding, he could barely fit it then. So I had to buy a silver one at the Ren. Fair/Scottish Highland Games. It got bent all the time to whereit was not a circle anymore. It's tungsten. I doesn't scratch, it doesn't bend, and there is no need to polish it. It stays shiny. If he lifted wieghts with it on, it would scratch the handles of the weights. It's shiny on the edges and a thin rope of metal in the middle. Really pretty. And since it looks like metal rope...Joe thinks it's cool. I got a brand new Singer sewing machine. Awesome. I made Tristan a bigger blanket and a drawstring skirt for me. Well, the skirt after trying to make something I couldn't understand the directions.......sheesh. Anyway.... 4 years have been great. A few rocky periods(which I blame some of it on location....central california blows...) But definately memorable and full of love and laughter. With Joe and me together(and even Tristan now too), there will be many more years of laughter to come.
posted by: Michelle  |  date & time: 9:25 AM  |  comments: (4)